Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
my dog ran away and came back with a marajuana plant. what are you doing tonight?
it's like doing a sit-up... but, you're inside someone
First I must say that I am disappointed to learn that you knowingly have trashy friends with whom you've not hooked me up.
Im in your car brotha dog. Its was unlocked, so im gonna sleep in it. well i mean i think its your car be your car.
It says a lot about how well I know you when I can understand messages of yours that say things like "sauteed Jesus."
He left an apology note saying he had to work and that there was coffee, OJ and food on the table with two Excedrin. I left his spare key with the door guard and she said "too bad I don't go for skinny white boys or I'd jump you both!" Best one night stand ever.
I didn't punch him it was just love coming out of my fist
His flight is delayed. Mother Nature is delaying me from sex.
Benefits of having to stay in jail for the weekend: learned how to make my own make up out of colored pencils. Also how to make use of toothpaste for hair products. Downfall was probably getting hit on by a murderer. Only me.
We could put on there: "Drink jager bombs and do stupid shit faster, with more energy!"
And as the acid sets in, he looks back at the shallow form he used to call his and whispers "3 pee pees strong"
This is the best 30th birthday ever. In a Motel 6 drinking a shower beer and sending slow-mo dick helicopter videos to you.
Like I said, all hypothetical...unless, of course, you'd be into that. My heart may skip a beat.
He ran out to tell us that somebody flooded the bathroom, then went back in there fell on his ass and asked why the floor was wet
Randomize
