VAGINAS EVERYWHERE
they're staring at me
susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
They're having chugging contests. With juice. Please get me out of Utah.
All I heard was "I swear it'll be funny" and then we were in jail.
the lady at the gas station just thanked me for wearing clothes this time... i am so confused
How do I tell my Dad that in the picture he has of me and my brother as the background of his phone we were both rolling face on ecstasy?
I mean, I thought you would respect me for turning your life around for the better. It seems just yesterday that I found you in a ditch with a cock in your mouth.
i am an animal i am literally locking myself in my house and not coming out for a week i don't deserve to be in public
Trying to figure out the logistics of putting my laptop speakers on this plate with the last slice of pizza. Too drunk to move the plate. Not an option.
I feel like a pet sloth would complement my lifestyle.
You popped the Plan B pill then clapped twice, said "mischief managed" and headed tward the bar.
Nothing says "Hello, Adulthood!" quite like receiving a dick photo at 11AM from a guy you haven't heard from since fifth grade.
It's official cum is not a great leave in conditioner
I just found your shirt hanging in a tree 4 blocks from the party...in the opposite direction of your house. where are you going?
I'm still thinking about that amazing orgasm last night. I literally heard angels singing "Hallelujah!!"
Randomize
