I woke up and there was 3 different size condom wrappers on the floor. What is this goldie locks and the 3 condoms???
She's the rare girl who loses weight and gets uglier.
imagine a blue Jetta with an ILLINOIS license plate that read JISLORD..... upon pondering it for 10minutes I came to the conclusion that J stood for JESUS and IF the license plate had enough room it would read "Jesus Is Lord"
sometimes you just have to pull up your panties, blow a kiss to the security camera and walk out of the alley like nothing happened.
He was a bulldog and my face was like rare meat. Never again with the drunken ones.
I'm venturing to your corner of this sin house in t minus 2 minutes.
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
The two girls sitting next to me are asking siri "Like, uh, how do you know my name?". Do I fuck with them or fuck them?
Was there a condom involved? Because he was saying he wanted a kid. Repeatedly.
I'll text you later. I think she thinks we're taking this whole "no sex" thing seriously.
His dick is magical but I don't want to die in this blizzard do you see my dilemma
Hella random but just hear me out...A bar that is a petting zoo. Bitches love petting zoos.
You know I've done a lot of messed up stuff. But I never thought I would have to put a bandaid on my dick. Yet here we are.
He just showed up in boxer briefs and loafers with only his phone and condoms
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
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