Just seen on a tshirt : "fake titties taste funny"
bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
I'm playing a game where i judge myself by whats in my cart. Also have 3 bright red giant buckets
Idk. I'm naked in front of the computer eating ribs. All is right with the world.
That's so nerdy and hot at the same time.
Oh shit I just realized the ropes are still tied to the bedposts
I left my bra and a book at his place. He's a hot Scandinavian who is into physics and computers - had to step up my game.
I woke up this morning and the lid to the back of my toilet was missing. Dahfaq do I do with this shit?
Try to make ecstasy cheese. Capitalize on the molly and greek yogurt trends. MARKETING
he just kept repeating "those were some pretty nipple-y tits" over and over the rest of the night
I woke up snuggling a bottle of water while Hercules played on Netflix. Whiskey Wednesdays
i mean i'm drinking free wine with lesbians and listening to sinead oconnor so i'm not sure who won that breakup
Holy shit, just saw a girl in the library smoking a bong disguised as a calculator
Waking up early to fuck the hot DILF the day before Father's Day because I'm respectable like that
It's hard to talk dirty with a mouth full of peanut butter
Knew i was going to puke. So i grabed a bowl out of the kitcken in the dark before bed...Ended up puking into a spaghetti strainer...
Randomize
