it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
I'll put it this way. My grandkids felt that fuck.
he saw my boobs and came all over himself... there goes my whole night.
My head. My head is the problem. Also alcoholism.
He ate me out on the balcony. My asian neighbors cats are judging me...ALL 3 OF THEM!!
Her vagina felt like a fur coat. It was weird at first but I kinda liked it
I offered to buy ihop waffles for all the homeless people outside the metro. It was time to go to bed.
Your list of "good ideas" thumbtacked to the lampshade last night consisted of nothing but "tampon-pen" with a note indicating that girls could then always have something to write with, even naked.
"Shots" of grape juice. I fucking hate Utah soooo fucking much.
Eating nacho cheese off the carpet. How is your morning?
Come to my pity party. It's being hosted in my basement. The theme is ambiguously sexual cuddling and wine.
Dinner at 5, shrooms at 10.
Also, if you don't fuck me soon, I will die. I don't want to die like that.
He stopped mid-fuck to explain his choice in pillows. HE WAS STILL IN ME!
Got my client divorced finally. He was even awarded the cat ashes. Yep I went to law school for this.
Randomize
