im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
he sent me a naked picture of himself. things got awkward really quickly. but on a positive note he shaved his chest
i went to throw her on my bed and threw her straight in to my bike
MCAT status: Day 64, no longer can remember what sex is like.
She crushed my hand with the box spring last time, so it's all good.
Drunk me wrote a bucket list last night. #4 is "hate fuck a childhood enemy". Can we make this happen?
my vagina can't take this anxiety. there is no way he is 19 and this smooth. he's lying about his age or he's a goddamn sexual prodigy
you can't just say no to brian. he was bugging me to get me to drunk for 14 hours straight yesterday. HE DOESN'T GIVE UP
Fuck romance. Just shaved my nipples in the shower because I felt like it. That's the life I'm about.
she keeps dunkaroos and gatorade in her bed. yep pretty sure im in love.
You're the only person I know that could get laid while visiting their grandpa in florida
I don't know whether to laugh it off or be pissed at him..I got pulled over this morning leaving his place and the officer thought my hickeys were hand prints around my neck and asked if I needed to be escorted out of town.
She forgot a bra so she just used seran wrap. The scary thing is, it worked.
If there was a gecko involved in your BDSM I'm gonna have to request that not happen when we live together ;)
I love my cat. she doesnt judge when i stumble in my house drunk and pass out on my floor. my dog looks at me disappointed.
Randomize
