hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
When did we start counting Thursdays as weekends?
When we got our fake ids in grade 11, why?
I just feel like it's time to start counting wednesdays as well...
I woke up laying in alphagetti with the message "I'd go get checked asap" written out in the letters.
ATMs should seriously have built in breathalysers, I would save so much money.
she just gave me a present from you... on a stripper pole. in front of the whole club. :)
WHY ISNT THIS A PICTURE MESSAGE
I have surprise drugs for everyone
I pretty much have hash tequila and gelato for dinner every night
Your cock is gonna weep like a baby
Um yeah. I just puked. And found your contact.
We were Chugging coronas for the soul purpose of launching limes out of the 3rd story window, I'd say it was a good weekend
I don't know what I'm more pleased with, the blowie last night or that fact that there's still 20 dollars in my wallet
I haven't received a dick pic from him lately. He's not even my boyfriend and I'm concerned. I hope he's alright.
When I wake up, please remind me why my shoe is in the toilet, my shower is filled with jello, and there is a naked girl sleeping on my coffee table holding a bag of Cheetos. that is all.
I just slammed a bottle of white wine before I came to Whole Foods so basically I'm just training to be a middle aged white woman.
There are 6 of us in a mini cooper and his maid is in the trunk...she needed a ride.
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