i bet even starving children in Africa take the crust off their poptarts
I just creeped all your pictures on Facebook -- it was like I watched you grow up right before my eyes.
So I went outside my house this morning and basically my entire front lawn is covered in gummi bears... I think that involves you guys.
I just peed on my pajamas. Its gonna be a long night. Don't forget the cookies.
do you realize that she was the awkward lesbian in high school and now bangs more girls than probably both of us combined?!
Struggs. It's also 90 degrees out but I'm not sure I can feel heat or cold any more. Too hungover.
Just caused a nice traffic jam while trying to park at Costco. Too high to drive.
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
I've been here 11 months and i just realized i have literally never looked at my apartment/roomates sober
Liquor has joined the party. Aly just fucking yelled "I LOVE COOKING" and poured margarita mixer, ice and tequila into the blender.
I woke up at 4am because the neighbors cat managed to sneak into my bed. HOW THE FUCK DOES THIS STUFF HAPPEN TO
I really regret not asking “like a cupcake” when you asked me to eat your ass
I’ve had a lot of vodka, 3 different dicks and no food since last night. Come get me
I gave him one of my famous hand jobs.
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
Randomize
