would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
we just stared at taco bell's menu on the website for 2 hours
We need a plan...
Find random men. Use them as sexual objects. There's our plan.
Party at my house. Beach themed. Clothing optional.
Wouldn't that make it "Nude Beach Themed?"
I found out his name. Apparently we sat in the shower together and flooded the bathroom.
He ate me out on the balcony. My asian neighbors cats are judging me...ALL 3 OF THEM!!
Dude if it is ever said "everybody get inside the police helicopter just showed up.". That means it was a successful party.
He sat on me and said I owed him $10, when I asked why he just said "lap dance"
okay we need to get tested.
no YOU need to get tested. I'm just going along for the ride.
If I spent my amateur stripper money does that mean I am cleansed of my sins?
Wake up. Smoke. Masturbate while eggos cook. Go back to bed. Smoke. Body spray shower. Beer with breakfast. Class. Morning of a champion.
It's three am. I'm drunk in a stairwell in Vegas. My flight leaves at six. Help.
I'm reading the Hobbit in my blanket fort alone with a bottle of wine... all I need is dungeons and dragons to complete this superfecta of awesome
So then edible panties?
Jesus no he likes candy too much, I'd lose a lip
I don’t know what language he speaks but I know my boobs will translate just fine
I’m looking forward to few days of international relations
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