If he comes back to you and I'm left alone in lonelytown I'm totally going to poo on your car.
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
For her birthday she wants to, " try something different with our butts a funnel and a bottle of whiskey"
She still cant shoot whiskey?
Im having serious doubts about this relationship
We stopped midfuck cuz a guy was walking his dog. Who the fuck walks their dog in the dorm parking structure at 3am!?
I went on my dinner date pretending that my lunch date didn't jizz in my hair.
Hypothetical Question: Would you take a cougar bullet for me?
She kept asking for cigarettes, than just put them in her purse as "savings"
My girlfriend is pregnant with her exs baby. 2014 just became the worst year
I AHVE A WINE BUCKETTTTTTT
Fall is here I will miss walking downtown in nothing but paint and pasties
the moment when you open a dick pic with your mom in the car... On your moms phone... Of your dad... Scarred for life
Hey babe! Random question. Do you by chance have the pic of my nipples covered with ninja turtles band aids? Thanks.
YOU JUST GOT OUT OF THE HOSPITAL AND YOU'RE ALREADY DRINKING?!
No he doesn’t answer my texts except for like on New Year’s Because like I was fucked up on New Year’s and he said happy new year and I told him the same and I called him dragonslayer and you can’t really recover from that
Randomize