the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
He tried to blame not having a condom on the economy.
I'm pretty sure we've had sex a bunch more times than we've hugged. So hugs are weird when they happen.
I was told to ask you about memoirs of a geisha.
Noooo. We thought it would be funny for him to wake up buried in the sand. But we just remembered about the whole high tide thing and it's dark and it's pretty damn hard to find an unconscious head sticking out of the sand. Just help us out
I got written up at work for smelling like sex and vodka. Still not sure how they put that into professional terms.
I vaguely remember making out with his tattoo (?) and giving him an awesome massage and then I passed out on his floor. Shrug
okay when i look at this i can see it on the future news along with the headline "picture scandal involving senatorial candidate sexually harassing drunken idiot in what appears to be a pink room of pain"
So the dude who sold me my english book is the same guy who let me punch him in the face in exchange for a cig at a party a few weeks ago. small world huh ?
State dependent memory. I just needed to feel my teeth. It was like a fog was lifted.
I'm doing an Uber ride of shame in a red, white and blue bikini top and America shorts. Good for me.
I just delete my bank app from my phone to have enough storage to download tindr. Is this my life now?
I'm like, not good at living.
I'm covered in glow paint and shame. I'm never leaving this country
He put your tit in his mouth. Professionalism is out the window after that.
okay valid
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