You know it's an interesting night when you drunkenly scream at your boss, "You'd make a HORRIBLE OBGYN!! You're hands are ENORMOUS!"
I just googled maps his house, and took the virtual tour back to my apartment, just so I could visualize the walk of shame in the morning
i feel like i want to date him just so i could be besties with his penis
I will give you a bj if you get me food. NOT A JOKE. FREE BJ.
I heard that if you win you get to have sex with me. You guys really need to stop wagering my vagina.
I think all I remember saying is, "I love Chris Berman's voice" and then I passed out
Most sexually ambiguous night of my life. Kept switching from the NBA finals to the Tonys.
No matter what I do you still love me. It's like loving a retarded kid. A retarded kid that keeps trying to sleep with you.
New drinking game. Every time Romney and Santorum switch leads, take a shot.
....this is what your political science major is getting you?
Sorry, not ignoring you.. We broke open the other piñata left from cinco de mayo and it was filled with condoms, mini booze bottles, and those little party horn things you blow into. You'll forgive me when we're fucking for days with all these free condoms.
Also his beard was very delicious looking. I wanted to touch it so bad, but I held back.
We hit a golf ball off Brady's ass. His dignity flew away into the night.
I showed up to a booty-call in my onesie pajamas and rubber boots
At least I'm fat on the outside. You can NEVER change being fat on the inside.
you yelled, puked and cried then passed out in the fetal position in your underwear
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