youre lurking in front of me
So I just found panties on our kitchen floor that had a slit in the vagina section. Does that mean shes open for sex, or she has a penis?
No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
I keep finding coffee grounds in my vagina
he just made me do "this little piggy" to his toes.
I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
Yehhhaaww I'm way ahead of you. I'm gunna get her a card that says " I'm sorry your now ex boyfriend decided to upgrade"
I remember key bumps, porn and a mom in my bed. Sums up my day.
that is an amazing summary hahaha
How do I enter a double puke and rally into my calorie counter?
I'm taking ecstasy it's gonna be that kind of Vegas trip
Last night must have been awesome because I went to get in the shower only to find the bat symbol drawn on my chest
That happened during battle shots lol
It was big, black, and had a smiley face tattooed on it. It was the perfect penis.
I refuse to be socially acceptable any longer than what is needed to pick up chinese food.
I’m traumatised. Bring vodka and condoms.
Randomize
