I dont know why I dont listen to you more often. He wont stop texting me. And his signature is "dancing with no panties on"
I can only name 15 people I've had sex with - can I just start claiming that as my sex number?
I just woke up covered In blood, I have cuts all over my body, I can't find my clothes from last night, I'm still wasted, i'm pretty sure I have a sprained ankle, and the best part is, I have absolutely no recollection of what led to this. THAT'S why vodka is the greatest drink in the world.
i just learned how to squirt via google. life is good.
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
Tell me why Im cashing out of Walmart with Smirnoff and catfood
My judgement was not "clouded". My judgement was in the midst of a fucking hurricane or something ridiculous.
Are the homeless actually allowed to bathe in fountains located on Main Street in downtown Houston? Can Houston TX be so progressive as to condone public bathing?
If it makes you feel any better... I have a friend who found out her mom was in the video for 2 Live Crew's "Pop That Pussy"
On a scale of zero to "unmitigated disaster," how drunk is he?
For a girl who cried from fear the last time she was asked out, this. Is. TERRIFYING!
Stop fucking Sharon's exes.
Sorry it took me so long to reply. I was fucking Sharon's ex.
Just to clear things up, yes you did lick the strippers butt
You should probably come home from vacation now. I make badddd decisions when you're gone.
Just found out a shooting happened in our parking lot while it was closed this morning. So thaaaaaaaaats fun.
Randomize
