It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
theres always time to masturbate. my grandpa taught me that.
This is one of those times where I really wish my vagina could tell me what happened last night.
I'm mentally preparing my vagina for this semester. It's fucking welcome week. I'm going to be talking to her all night.
Awkward family moment #1: walked in on my 15 yr old nephew packing a bowl. Nephew says- "lets not ruin christmas and keep this our little secret"
Reading my bank statement stoned makes me feel like an adult.
I feel like his penis would have a weird haircut because he does.
I totally left my shirt at your house. Also I think I high fived your cactus last night
I lost my vibrator temporarily and for some unknown reason my first thought was that you might have stolen it. But then I realized you would never do that because you know it keeps me from killing people. But I am overtired and lacking in faith.
Not sure what happened last night, but I woke up without a shirt on and cereal glued to my boobs...
I'm sorry that you wanted to get laid and I all I did was play with your new cat instead.
I walk into the pharmacy and I'm like "I need three morning after pills" and the guy was like "uhhhh". All I said was "we didn't plan it, we all just got laid the same night"
I need to stop waking up with no pants on.
what happened this time
I dont know everyone was gone and there was a bird in the room
There's a video of you almost falling asleep in a bar stool listening to Jimmy Buffett. Nekkid.
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