Should I have kids to fix a relationship??
Fuck him tonight for the both of us. We're still tag-teaming in spirit.
just had to re-breakup with her. it was like shooting a dead horse that was crying and talking.
It got kind of awkward when her dad brought home a 20 something asian girl at 3am
i watched you ride a mechanical penis. nothing is awkward between us anymore.
You had us pull over so you could pee, you proceeded to pee in some random persons front yard while yelling "im not ashamed"
You should make it a point to use vocabulary that is competition appropriate around him, like "champion" and "training" and "victory sex"
Oh man, buzzed lunch fridays almost got out of hand.
I have lots of feelings today, but drunk is my favorite.
If you really loved me, you'd support my weed habit.
As the person who squeezed you out of my vagina, the answer is no.
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
oh I'm washing fake blood out of my bra.
I NEED to hang out with you more
Walgreens has pop rocks. Be prepared to get your dick sucked.
He's my favorite late night booty call. He lives next to a Wendy's.
I'm officially disproving the fact that a hoe never gets cold bc this hoe is COLD.
Randomize