I like bacon cheeseburgers and the pussycat dolls
Does that mean you want me to loosen up your buttons at carls jr?
Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
i feel like the song jizz in my pants was made for him.
maybe if you didn't yell 'buh duh duh da duh da dats all folks' when you came she wouldn't have left last night
i got pulled over in my 'cops love me' tshirt. he didn't think it was funny when i pointed it out.
just realized i can abbreviate thomas paine as t pain in poli theory class notes....YES
whatever happens this semester dont let me be that girl yacking in the urinal. again.
It was perfect I came I passed out in his comfortable bed then a glass of jack Daniels fell from the bed post and spilled all over my face
Serious question...Is it possible to get a DUI on a kayak?
At my place... I'm gonna be honest though stonewall Jackson is not going to be able to rally the troops. Too many shots of tequila
Turns out she left way earlier. So I'm stuck with this guy asking where he can score meth and if I'm really straight.
We are in Florida for 3 days. The people in charge of shit brought: a waffle maker, a cheese grater and a SEWING MACHINE
AND NO VODKA
Note to self: don't try to shave your legs when sex-sore. You CANT reach, stop trying.
250 people in this lecture & my prof asks who already drank green beer this morning& is drunk right now. I WAS THE ONLY ONE TO RAISE MY HAND
it was all good until mid make out when he announced 'i just came'. ...he wasn't joking.
Randomize