Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
When I was her age, Pluto was still a planet... but i said what the hell
man, i hate rosetta stone. i wanted to impress this girl with italian last night but all i could say were things like "a blue airplane" and "he is wearing a white shirt"
so apparently mom and dad slept together on the first date
i guess it runs in the family.
she both took care of me and took advantage of me. it was BEAUTIFUL.
like when he blacked out and we found him in the garden eating your tomatoes off the vine
also, I just found three random bruises on my knee. probably from when I was velcrod to the stairs
Driving around Panama at 7 am looking for an open liquor store..
Well I disagree, 3 different men in my bed over my birthday was the perfect way to say goodbye to my childhood innocence
You chest bumped everyone we walked by on the way home... Even girls
wearing my old cheerleader outfit to the bar was a great way to get free drinks. i should do this more often
"YOU A2TE UNDERAGE LOL" Got that at 2am. Gotta stop dating alcoholics.
she walked in on me throwing up in the sink with my pants around my ankles and I said "i'll be with you in a sec"
Just wore the promise ring dad gave me freshman year of high school as a fake wedding band while I bought a pregnancy test. I think it's safe to say that's not what he had in mind with that gift 14 years ago.
I'm no doctor but I don't think balls are supposed to look like that.
Randomize