Dude she looked like Jerry Garcia's knuckles
is it wrong that I prefer my women with low self esteem and a smidgen of an eating disorder?
Stop being a whore!!! Everyone can see!!!!
Said he had been eating pineapple for a week before our 1st date. Not sure if thankful for his consideration or offended by his assumption.
someone just drove by blasting livin on a prayer and threw like 6 bagels out the window... was it you?!
He just told me that when we were doing it I told him I was the captain and he was the boat. Im too embarassed to ask for money for a cab.
AND I JUST GOT FUCKING DAUGHTER ZONED. NO. I'M DONE. I HATE BOYS. ASEXUALITY HERE I COME.
Don't worry, I could have been accepted their by waving my dick at the admissions building.
It feels like a bunch of leprechauns are using my brain as a soccer ball
Pencil dick carries the name proudly.
My whole sorority girl exterior is just a lie. I'm a fat tumblr girl on the inside.
I dont know it just seems wrong to fuck her on my exes back porch
have fuck
*fun
actually forget it have a fuck too it'll do you good
My liver is going to reject life during Greek Week
How many liver transplants can a person have? Bc you may need a couple
I admit I fucked your best friend, but to be fair, you fucked the tristate area. So there's a good chance about 40% of those people are MY friends.
Randomize
