Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
My vagina has become a graveyard for my brother's friendships...
we walked in to her beating him with a broom while he was trying to sweep ramen into a box. there were packing peanuts everywhere.
So I feel bad, Ross is asking questions, I think they need to know it's a Spanish lesbian bar
Worst bachelorette party. She got smashed and cried because she thinks she might have herpes from when she cheated on him. Not looking good for them.
My getting drunk and marrying a stranger in Vegas final court annulment papers just came in the mail... I might frame that shit
I just saw him carrying his little sister while walking his puppy. And he was shirtless. I swear my ovaries just exploded
Her eyebrows were plucked so thin that she had to have gonorrhea. Clean girls just don't pluck that way
It took me half an hour to realize I didnt know them
I just paid for weed by taking him to the store to buy cheese so he could make empanadas. Best. Drug deal. Ever.
Is there like a dick file on me? Guys can't hold two dicks anymore?! Who are you people????
PENIS EMOJIS WOULD MAKE MY LIFE SO MUCH EASIER GAH WHY DOES THE WORLD HATE ME
This place is full of unfortunate mustaches.
i left you alone for two hours TWO HOURS & when i got back i had to rush you to the hospital because you were covered in Smooth Away pads & drinking the bong water..
i was in class looking for a pencil and found a chicken strip in my back pack. i think i might have a problem.. sad thing is i ate it
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