All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
Just tipped at a bar in cheerios. Suck it.
ugh. my friday night is playin' Farmville on my face. time to harvest the blackheads...
I think the secretary can hear it when I fart in the bathroom, how do you think she feels about that?
woke up with a used condom shoved in my ear. i officially hate alcohol.
You can buy vodka at target here.. Maybe Missouri isn't so bad after all
You and Eric are like slutty bowling balls, and that poor family are the pins. They won't know what hit em.
strike, motherfucker.
Hypothetically going to the gym on coke was a good idea
Am I allowed to compare getting cum'd on the face to a warm summer rain?
Honestly it's a super power. I can try it a million different ways and nothing happens. Donnie casually says "ok this is now a toppless party" and it all kicks-off
We need to talk about your improper dealings with the town drug dealer.
Apparently my thong was thrown in the cornfield last night. No one will tell me why.
That's not "anything", that's you deep throating a mozzarella stick.
Would you paint my ceiling for oral sex?
Just convinced the cute guy from class that I have prostate cancer. GET ME OUT OF THIS TOWN!
Randomize