i just wanna skin you and wear you like last years versace.
you may have the big hair, fake nails, and talk with a fake accent, but you will NEVER be a housewife from new jersey so STOP TRYING.
Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
Say something about gay babies.
ok think of it like jelly beans. if you can learn to like the licorice ones, youll always have lots of them because no one else wants them. its the same with fat chicks
you would have Pina Colada flavored saliva.
I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
there should be laws that require people like to me to be on birth control.
I hope your lack of response means you're banging, not talking about her purity ring.
I'm drinking wine from the cap of my laundry detergent container, wearing my bed sheet as a cape. How do you think I'm taking it?
if i actually get asked out by my dealer what could happen?
i don't know, but it probably involves bathtubs full of weed
If you put those two in a room together it'd be like a Taylor Swift fantasy and an Adele nightmare just licking faces
Omg how many tall cans is too many tall cans for 1 pm
Congrats on dating a convict, there's no fitbit badge for that one.
Turns out end of the world sex is H-O-T, HOoot! I'll be the only progressive lady smiling today
I love it when strippers help me get other strippers numbers.
Randomize
