i have a strong urge to join the asians in the park doing tai chi. I think im still high .
You were right. It hurts to walk today.
I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
nutella sex= disaster
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
Just blew my age on the breathalyzer. I also have 8 stitches in my head. So worth a .22 though. All time record.
no im not bringing booze its easy, you just challenge a drunk guy to beer pong, he'll hand you two beers, you lose on purpose, and everyone makes fun of you. but we laugh in the end for bringing nothing to a byob
The number of times I have seen your cock and the number of times I have wanted to see your cock are different!
I said that I'm avoiding parties and guys, and the freshman girl just laughed
There was a huge crash. I came out of my room to find you sprawled out at the bottom of the stairs in your bra and panties. You looked at me, yelled 'WHAT AM I DOING WITH MY LIFE' and then ran back into his room.
she and her cat are both sick as fuck so they just sat there looking at each other with her nose dripping on the cat's. both out of fucks
This whole pope visit thing is ruining me having sex.
I found three naked dudes in your bed this morning. Did we have a really weird break in or do you need to tell me something?
All I can remember from last night was eating nutella and touching myself to Weird Science.
Sorry I bailed on you yesterday. I was propositioned.
And you don't turn down margaritas and oral.
Randomize
