I swear to god I'm with a high end prostitute right now and shes the most interesting person I've ever met. She just took me in to share an evening.
And as an added bonus she seems to have gotten a blood stain out of my favorite t-shirt
Godddamnit i jsu woke up in oharee. My connecxtion left an hro ago. Thosse flight atttendants can DRinK
You're the unicorn of the gay community. Unbelievable and unattainable.
The guy in front of me in Sociology is definitely working on my farm in farmville. Never met him before. Do I thank him?
My RA tried to compliment my pong tables design after he confiscated it
I waited so long to accept his friend request that he canceled it. So I added him and when he accepted I deleted him. I wonder how long this will be funny to me
It got to the point that I had to make flashcards with their name on the front and dick pics on the back.
We just took turns doing keg stands. 27 is way too old for this. Out of 5 of us, our best time was 9 seconds.
Me too. We could do it like prostitutes. No kissing on the mouth.
Every single item that was in my fridge is now in my hot tub. Please help
Dude, you need to man up. You passed out before a PRESEASON game. It's a long season.
Well I'm in the bathtub smoking a bowl and eating doritos and frosting so I might not be the one to advise you on this shit but I'll try.
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
I forgot to tell you that he serenaded me with "Fuck Her Gently" by Tenacious D. And I didn't hate it.
Holy. Shit. I just remembered all the lapdances....
Randomize
