just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
I was drunk at peters. now im drunk at my apartment. and hungry. but mcdonalds is broken. wtf
If my thighs hurt from cage dancing last night, I can only imagine how yours feel
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
He gave me such a powerful orgasm I blurted out I love you. This is why just rebouding out of a serouis relationship is awkward.
I had to break up with him he didn't understand my priorities. I'm sorry but Saturday nights are for pot and Doctor Who. I'm not going to change who I am.
We let him drunkenly pack his own bags without checking them. Yet no one was surprised when the TSA girl pulled a 12 pack out of his carry on.
If you've ever wondered what a shitshow is, just watch me at the bar on a Friday. Or Tuesday. Take your pick.
I'm still high with raccoon eyeliner eyes and chocolate all over my face and chest, clutching a mug of wine. Happy graduation.
Did you get any pics? And I can only imagine how inferior you must have felt knowing that somewhere in that room was a guy whose penis was the length of your forearm.
There is nothing worse then the feeling after you've held in farts all night..
What's his name?
After passing out at the kitchen table, you woke up in my parents bed in between them. With no pants on.
While walking to class I was handed a red bull, condoms, and a mini bible. I love my school.
Could someone explain to me why there were 40 individually wrapped burritos in the fridge when I woke up this morning?
It doesn't matter how nice the shirt you wore to the bar was, you still shouldn't have worn it to a job interview
Randomize
