So I tried to call my phone from his phone and was like, "hey, my name is not in here..I thought you had my number" turns out he has my number saved as "gives good head"
I don't remember much but I know I looked hot.
you were crying and trying to give advice to people.. that's was a new level of drunk for you
have the fact that the early bird is danced upon by the prettiest strippers be your motivation
she did 8 shots of vodka. THROUGH A SIPPY STRAW
I have got to meet this girl.
We need to do something soon. I need like 4,000 beers and a cigarette.
Sorry I couldn't make it...got a scrambled voicemail, all I heard was "Bring the dildo"
Got drunkdialed by my estranged mom while wallowing in pinkeye drinking 100 proof eating ramen alone. Year summed up perfectly.
Well you should have thought of that before you were reckless with your butt
Some guy named spider just bought me 5 shots
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
I hate that I still want him to look at me as the vagina that got away.
Btw I thought it was impossible to use up 48 bottles of patron in one night but I was wrong...
i woke up half naked on someone's pool lounge chair in a house that i don't know, with someone's phone number scrawled on my stomach. why do i hang out with you again??
You just listed two reasons.
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
Randomize
