Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
R and i have drinken 4 bottles od red wine. By ourselfs
They high fived over us while we gave them synchronized blowjobs. In the same bed. Under the same blanket.
The grocery store is a combo of ghetto ppl complaining that the low fat chips are all that's left and hipsters trying to eat organic during the hurricane
The chlamydia really affected his face.
A gentleman never tells..... therefore i will neither confirm nor deny the attatched photos
She said we couldnt stop drinking until there were enough bottles to make a fort. so we could have sex in our "bottle castle"
It was fine until he came back to my place, grabbed a beer, HIGH-FIVED me, and left.
I've been on this train for an hour and this women has been on the phone and all she's said is "guuurrrrrlllll, gurl, gurl." I may commit suicide.
DON'T WEAR PANTS.
I REPEAT.
DO. NOT. WEAR. TROUSERS.
i put frozen meatballs in my drink thinking they were ice cubes and I'm vegetarian wtf
Well, we all woke up in drag with no memory of why we were in drag. On the plus side, this shade of lipstick looks really good on me.
When's the best time to point out that all of my orgasms this year have been self-administered? Valentine's day?
I seriously just had to blow dry my thong.
They picked up the lamp, held it aloft, and proclaimed apropos of nothing “this is going right up my ass”. LOUDLY
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