i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
I woke up on the side of the highway to the ppl in orange jumpsuits cleaning to comunity service. Not sure which freaked them out more... Finding a dead b ody or me not being dead
his penis was like watching paranormal activity your very hyped up to see it but you think it might be very scary and in the end you didnt really see anything at all
just masturbated through my pocket at the library. hope you're enjoying your saturday night out.
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
She is feeding us popcorn out of her bra
I just took a shower and I feel like 20 pounds of sex just came off of me.
Me either. I want to get 'chase a stray cat through the neighborhood in my hooker heels' drunk. And it's your birthday, so you have to get 'best friend holding your hair while you puke in the bar bathroom and cry about your life' drunk. In a feather boa.
I HAVEN'T FUCKED ANYONE IN FOREVER AND A HALF I DON'T DESERVE TO BE A TRASHY BLONDE
IS SOBER OCTOBER A THING?? WTF WHO ARE THESE PEOPLE?
Okay we're getting vodka and coming
Okay. Joe has my machete attached to his belt
Totally uneven. One tiny pussy lip that almost didn't exist and one giant lip that unfurled liked 5 different times half way down her leg and could have been used to hoist the mainsail on a pirate ship.
Ya. My thumbs are those buffalo's, but my legs are spirits and my torso is that Indian guys and my head is the eagle
Man i fell asleep on a random persons porch on the way home and woke up to the family banging on the windows trying to wake me up
It's called life, you pretentious bitch. Grow up.
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