Our dealer is pledging my frat. When he come to sell me weed I make him take out the garbage.
we were running to make last call and you stopped me and said very seriously "if i fall, go on without me. just make sure theres a beer in my hand when you go"
Just so we're clear, that's a yes to the honey, but if you get marshmallow fluff anywhere near my body we are never doing this again
I think its pretty common. 1 out of every 4 people probably have a stripper's phone # in their phone.
Dude, he threw a pool chair off of an 8 story building. It was a successful night I'd say.
No padding. I spent my whole summer with my nips out. October don't need that too.
You. Dating a sex offender cop. Life writes itself sometimes.
I'm taking ecstasy it's gonna be that kind of Vegas trip
I don't want to jinx anything but I may have found the one.
Cat or human?
Human
So you let the Viking explore your nether regions?
Random pof guy just messaged me initiating a Pokemon battle. Want to be a bridesmaid?
a girl walked up to me and asked if you were my brother. she shook her head and said 'im so sorry' when i said yes. what did you fucking do????????
Sean just lit a cig with his taser..... I am in awe
I wonder if the sex shop has any Black Friday deals.
Next time we do shrooms i am finding an open field at sunrise and running through it and nobody is stopping me this time!
Randomize
