I finally had kitchen counter sex! i was so excited
we found him in the shower with a bottle of jose saying "this is Mexico's fault"
Wouldn't be the first time..I think there's a subliminal message constantly playing in my mind that says 'blackout', 'throwing up is fun' 'too sober'
She tried to kill herself by taking a whole packet of panadol. I mean HELLO THAT'S ME EVERY SUNDAY MORNING.
Fell twice in five points. on my face. literally during a cross walk. The cars just went around me. 21st birthday memories right there
I don't know how or when he is sober long enough to donate plasma
OMG CHARGE YOUR PHONE I NEED TO KNOW IF THIS IS A GOOD PICTURE OF MY ASS
Do you remember doing synchronized hip thrusts to Michael Jackson? Probably one of my favorite parts of the night
I consider any night I don't make out with someone a bad night. So I've been great.
Are you saying being a wizard and going to hogwarts wouldn't be life changing, believe in magic you fucking muggle
You ripped my pants off and gave me the choice use it or lose it what was I suppose to do.
I guess it's part of life. Sometimes your ex boyfriend becomes a drag queen.
what happened last night?!
you took a shot and then laid down on our kitchen table and passed out.. then when we tried to move you to the couch you screamed "no! i love tables"
I am NOT losing my v-card to a guy who doesn't know my ass from my elbow.
Can you cover for me after lunch? I’ve never seen a guy who cums as much as my new Side Dick so now I need to clean the house before my husband gets home
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