If I was Danny Tanner and my wife died and left me with three kids I would hire a nanny rather than bringing in the sexually promiscuos uncle with a fetish for leather and rebellion and my obviously mentally ill (possibly gay) best friend Joey, who has never had a girlfriend and consistently talks in cartoon voices... a nanny is just a better choice
Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
I cant video chat with you tonight, my parents are home
r u implying that im some kind of v-chat prostitution whore?
And she was like "I wanted you all for myself, to love you, and treat you like gold."... See this is why I shouldn't fuck Italian chicks...
party gras won. party gras always wins.
MASS TEXT! MASS TEXT! Your sad horny friend has finally gotten it in and can go back to being normal once again. You're welcome.
He needs a high five right to the fucking mouth. With a chair. Or an atomic bomb.
Nothing says love like couples STD testing
Nothing says breakup like the results
Happy you have kids and I don't day!
I guess I'll just chalk it up as a learning experience and a lot of great sex.
im glad im back to a point in my life where i have enough sex to sometimes be offered and be like naw im good.
reason #326 why I'm still single.... my date just told me there's a little boy ghost that lives in his closet because he likes his music.
im watching blue is the warmest color at the music box and this dude is literally masturbating 3 feet in front of me
One of my pillows is missing but it's cool because there is a beef stick.
a day off where I don’t get laid would be worthless
Randomize
