so i replaced his speed with my ped egg shaveings
dont u have athletes foot?
i just sent my parents are gone come over I have condoms to my mom because Derek changed my numbers while I was passed out
I don't remember what your face looks like..
I don't remember your face either, just your dick.
I just need you there to slap my dick when im flirting with her
the arrest was probably divine intervention, cause i think we were heading to an ill-advised threesome.
My last memory involves me naked in a mens's bathroom stall. I really hope my date was with me.
and then you looked me right in the eyes and said "i just really wanna pet some horses right now"
On a scale of one to liver failure, how bad would it be if I played thunderstruck alone?
my mom called me mid shot and i accidentally answered and kept calling her my own name. somehow i thought that would help the situation.
So I had sex in a bulldozer lastnight now that's definitely a first...
He's the stereotypical redneck. He tried to go kayaking during a storm and almost got into a fight when a park ranger tried to stop him
Is it considered a bad morning to find your boss half naked in the parking lot of work at 7am?
That depends, how hot is your boss?
You're like the Miss Manners of anonymous gay sex.
You're so sweet in the most vulgar ways
I have to touch the horse lube. :-(
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