You just compared our sex life to a seven year old kid.
Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
i paused nhl 10 while i jerked off and it was like a crowd was cheering me on
My family is watching Intervention and taking notes. I need to leave NOW!
I havent jerked off in so long, my dick literally prevented me from rolling over in my sleep this morning. new definition of painful?
She woke up 3 seperate times, each time she had a look of pure terror on her face, she had no clue where she was.
He passed out mid-signature
Just found out my mom's voicemail password is 6969..
You have no idea how much I'm praying for my moms side of the family's infertility right now
Oh I forgot to tell u. I hit someone with my car in the RiteAid parking lot. More like a nudge.
the only way to explain how i feel is someone rolled me down a big fucking hill and then a dog came a took a huge ruthless shit in my mouth at the bottom
Absolutely. I could drink and smoke that memory away in a matter of years at my current rate.
I just did a line of coke with an Olympic bronze medallist. I guess we know why he only got bronze.
The sun is out, the birds are chirping, I made some brownies, I'm not pregnant
This is literally what my 13-year old cousin said to me this morning.
Knowing there are different types of spiders in different countries and regions makes me never want to travel.
Randomize
