Wow, t9 really hates the phrase "slap her in her sanctimonious pie-hole."
Literally like 10 people walking in my building talking about how much they hate draco
the guy in front of me just bought a pound of bacon, a bouquet, and a case of budlight, i want to see THAT makeup sex
Before he took my jeans off all he said was "no hard feelings from middle school right?"
so i had sex last night with my 12th partner, but hes number 1 for my first time using a condom. i think im finally learning.
Give me the approximate price and I'll give you the equivalence in blowjobs.
Nobody knew what to do when it was dead. You said fire up the George Foreman, I've never ate baby shark. She hasn't stopped crying.
Your expertise in crazy bitches is needed.
So the chick throws up over the rail from the 15th floor at the sky bar and I knew I would take her back to my hotel.
On a toatally unrelated note, I see music in my hair
Bacon Cheddar rum burgers are as great as they sound. I knew that 100 proof Captain would be good for something other than vomit.
Should I take my grandma to a keg tomorrow or not? Serious question
Why am I getting texts saying are you ready for this butthole? Help
I got so high that I ate a protein bar while in the shower. I then proceeded to leave half the protein bar and the wrapper on the ledge in my shower. Haha oh well.
I'm not sure. But he has a pet sugar glider. So, points either way
As long as that's not his name for his dick.
Randomize
