on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
College is just filling the gap until I get a rich girl pregnant
He had a huge mole on his dick. Genetics has cockblocked him for life.
This place doesnt have redbull or serve shots. Its like they are at war with fun.
We found you on the floor drooling you kept saying over and over how you were double jointed.
I've always wanted to pass out in a bathtub
I think most people do. Your only real mistake was turning the water on first.
I pulled my bra out of my dress and handed it to my mom..at cocktail hour during the wedding.
I hope my orgasm sounds aren't secretly that bad and no one tells me
How does this dude know what a dying walrus sounds like? That's the real question
Just drove by where I lost my sausage gravy virginity
Part of my treatment is getting high and having sex with 22 year olds. I have a prescription!
How many drinks/blunt hits do you think I could get if I wore an "it's my birthday" shirt
The typical response to someone smacking their vodka soaked hand on your face is not to put your face in their crotch
I seriously had alll four of your knuckles bruised into my arm
Your rough animalistic sex sounds are disrupting my cocktail hour
He drank an entire six pack, past out on the guest bed, woke up around 4AM, lifted & dropped my leg, then peed on the corner of the bed. When I told him where he was pissing he said "it's all the same babe."
Randomize
