you were mad bc i took longer then 2 minutes to finish
I have taken lazynest to a new level. I took a picture of the notes on the board instead of writing them. I win.
in hindsight, the duct tape banana hammock was a bad idea.
hey, sorry about all the butter. I thought it was gonna help.
He came, while we were making out fully clothed. I'm going to write a book.
I knew it was time to stop when you guys were playing a drinking game called "every three steps take a drink"
He is really real. Like I know where he works, have referenced him with mutual fb friends and I've seen his dick. He's real.
I remember caressing his hands asking him if he moisturized, then i proceeded to put his hands on my face
I'm sure if Robin Williams was still with us he would want you to see boobs.
I'm watching Trainwreck with Jeff and realizing that I'm the John Cena in my relationship.
If you're doing something that makes your best friend lock you in a bathroom you shouldn't be doing it
It's scary that my vibrator is a dangerous weapon. I want a new one.
sorry i was ignoring you last night i accidentally did a bunch of pcp and thought i was inside tron
Are we at that level of friendship where we can share slutty stories and not hold it against the other person at a later date ?
my penis made a compromise with my morals
Randomize
