i just google searched 'can you pop your ovary'
just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
stop bragging. last time i got laid i got double pink eye, and it was so not worth it
This girl caught me staring at the cat but stroking the computer because it was closer, which is why I hate blunts.
Who is he, asking me if im dtf without a question mark
...
I'm really proud of myself for not blacking out yet this weekend!
It's a Thursday.
NO I FORBID YOU. THERE ARE BETTER VIRGINITIES OUT THERE WORTH KIDNAPPING.
Two months ago an unknown man was in my bed and now he is my boyfriend and he has 1.6 million in the bank and he buys me things because I only have $4.35 in my bank account
It could happen to you too!
He facetimed with his son when he was still inside of me. If that's not a dedicated dad I don't know what is
You owe me beer. On another note, I made out with the ups guy at work today ....
all I know is id definitely throw up if you guys ever dated so if you do stay the fuck away from me
I turned off my domesticated goddess switch over 2 years ago and idk how to turn it back on. So in the mean time I'll dodge this gf bullet and eat free steak for as long as possible
So I just saw someone get shoved into a car trunk by your car.
I told you naked hot tub wrestling would turn bad now one of us has a gash on the head and another a black eye
Best news I’ve heard all day. Cookies and dick. What more could a girl ask for?
Randomize