We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
It was like a spaceship landed and 1000s of hipsters filled up the park
I was eating out this girl yesterday and when I finished, she asked me if I wanted to take any home with me. She was serious, dude!
What does that even mean?
you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
Its like they don't get that I only talk to them before homecoming, thanksgiving, or any other time I go home. I love highschool girls.
My dealer threw in a "freestyle rap" today with my purchase. I dont know if I can handle this relationship.
sorry he hasn't talked to me since the surprise salvia incident...
I was preparing to do my walk of shame shirtless, but then I found my sweater, wallet and keys neatly piled under a tree in the park.
Dinner?
YES CON MARGARITAS POR FAVOR!!!! MUCHO MARGARITAS!!!
he said we should drink responsibly and we all just kinda sat there laughing at him
i saw way too much penis for that to have been a funeral
Realizing life ain't all about burritos and strippers, it's a struggle out there, and it ain't looking pretty so far,..
Who knew sons of strippers would be really feminist boyfriends?
Let's make a rule now, to not smoke weed out of our trumpets. After tonight.
Between falling off a shelf on to a concrete floor and sex with you - i may never walk again.
Randomize
