cab driver gave us mini bottles of jd for the ride home & proceeded to run every red light. wonder how many bottles he drank.
as for my dating sex life, no more regret sticks. Only pride wands from now on.
my clit piercing makes the metal detector go off
As it turns out, drunk trust falling that guy at the top of the waterslide didn't really work out for anyone..
His penis was definitely too big to be the type that wants commitment. Shit.
He said female orgasms are a myth and refuses to even try to give me one.
I got a letter from the home owners association saying its against policy to have sex on the trampoline.
I've fucked 6 of my brothers' friends. I'm completely fine with him fucking the girl we ate lunch with.
Why were my jeans in the freezer of the mini fridge, and how long have they been in there? On another note, I found my teacher's ID badge.
17. The number of times my one night stand told me he loved me.
I know I come to this conclusion on a fairly regular basis but I really do need a babysitter
so in addition to the two guys I slept with last night, and the third that I turned down this morning, a fourth has appeared. best Valentine's Day ever.
I'm so horny right now but I JUST put my fuckin lasagna in the oven
He told you he loved you. Then you wanted to find a chainsaw to cut his dick off.
I am cleaning melted cheese out of my hair. This is a new experience for me
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