Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
The weird kid in front of me is reading an article titled "why don't i have a girlfriend?" the article then continues to talk about the mathematical equation for obtaining a girlfriend. exhibit a of why he is single
stranger just walked up to the fridge at the party, took the hawaiin punch out, drank it straight from the bottle, looked at everyone who stared in awe and said "im fucking thirsty" and put it back.
just found deep spiritual meaning in spongebob.... that high.
you were sitting on my toliet with a double cheesburger in your hand asking me how the cheeseburger even got there.
It would be celebrated in history as "the orgasm heard round the world"
He burnt a smiley face into the screen with a cigarette, peed in my tub and then tried to take off his pants. tried...
Also got home. Still stoned. Mom was up. We made a pizza and were writing a children's book. Sleep good.
You should make it a point to use vocabulary that is competition appropriate around him, like "champion" and "training" and "victory sex"
how was it?
he was petting the bushes because they were "napkins"
Just put an ad on Craigslist for a fake groom... I'm sure only non creepy sane people will respond to it
Oh and apparently Friday night I came home and tried assembling the Christmas tree until my mom just told me to go to bed. Blackout.
That super awesome moment when the guy who threw up in your bed last night crawls into your roommate's bed the next morning...Naked...She was in it.
He said his fantasy involved both of us fucking while stuffed into the same overalls
Her name was Danica but I felt like it would be hard to say drunk so I called her Shelby
Randomize
