okay pat passed out under dana's car
omg. he's a virgin strip club employee who's going to college on a ping pong scholarship. this is unreal.
apparently i was just sitting there with my shirt down holding my boobs saying "its ok. its all gonna be ok"
we were canoeing in the lake and i asked if he was too drunk for this, and he said "don't worry about it, i'm half native american"
Part of my whole not being a slut anymore involves not giving other peoples boyfriends blowjobs
Thanks for making breakfast. I usually have cereal and coffee...but i think margaritas and turkey sandwiches could catch on.
I'm not saying I'm drunk, but I'm definitely saying my liver has its work cut out for it.
Dropping the entire last roll of TP into the toilet is a hurt you don't want to know.
He just showed up. He's like 5'8 and brought a beer pong table that has " I love gay boys" on it. How could this go wrong
Should I get the rainbow boxer breifs???
As your boyfriend, this is a level of gay that even I can't handle.
I heard drunk is the new sober. I heard me say that. To a cop. Can you come get me??
Using my graduation announcement box as a table to roll a blunt on. I've official stopped giving a shit about senior year
It tasted better than Jesus's hair.
Is she blowing you? I'm in the closet.
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
Randomize