you can't spend the night you always smell like dirty underwear and my roommates complain
Whats contracted in vegas does not stay in vegas....
i am about to cut my stepbrother's hair into a mohawk with the same clippers i use to trim my pubes. god is so on my side today.
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
I think hes settled down now. He's just licking the walls and the windows.
Oh so it was one of those "I shouldn't have gotten in a cab with a random 21 year old girl" kinda nights.
And then he proceeded to take my heartbeat, because apparently that tells him whether I was faking or not...
I got the number from the girl at uhaul even after she saw me throw up all over the parking lot with a 6 pack in my hands.
I deem her datable let the dance of attraction commence
He says he invented a new sex move called The Redbird that we can only do when I'm on my period. Should I be concerned?
I have a high opinion of you, you smash bitches. Respect.
Of course I'll be there. I never miss an opportunity to smell like cigarettes, cheap beer, and shame.
Is it totally terrible that I just signed up for classes and already found the guy I'm going to bang??
We need a rematch, I think my pussy was on vacation the other night.
Thanks for being my best friend so I can use you as an alibi to my family while I'm out getting some dick in my face.
Randomize
