Saw a Delta Zeta recruitment poster today. On it, somebody added, "All you need is your daddy's credit card and a lack of self-respect."
I just watched the Dark knight, Maggie Gylennhaal looks like Katie Holmes after a stroke
i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
I just puked in a penis shaped cake pan. I've hit an all new low for a Tuesday.
So am i just your go-to 'i found a tick on my penis' number?
It's sad that my net worth at the moment is 4 beers
You were throwing up and said, "Whipe my face, I must look presentable at all times."
Dude this deaf chick is totally hot, I just bought an apartment on boner ave
I just witnessed my first non cocain induced sunrise in five years.
Not my cup of tea
Tell them to carpool to pride, have a 3way, and if one says 'no thanks' just tell em it's not gay if it happened in a 3way!
I told my grandmother all I want is a nice guy who likes to be tied up.
Ate a live seahorse, then tried to order a nacho bell grande from an ATM.
How the fuck do you get to keep practicing as a Nurse.
Wednesday is good, I needed the head count for the orgy, caroling can happen with as few as 2 people. There will be a pinata.
For the caroling or the orgy?
lets face it, we have a liquor cabinet with a designated chocolate shelf
Remember when you brought a guy home from the bar... to our parents house.... on thanksgiving eve?
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