you know that saying beer then liquer makes you sicker, it should be beer then pickles makes you throw up alot, everywhere.
So let me get this straight. You would sleep with an uncircumcised guy whose name you didn't know, but you won't try the new shrimp taco from taco bell?
all I remember is repeatedly winking at the fire marshall while he was counting the people in the bar
Almost made out with Amanda but I told her "I'm in a committed fake lesbian relationship with Laura. I can't."
you have no idea the dirty thing i want to do to your blad spot. please wear my vagina as a hat.
That bottle of wine took a part of my soul with it.
Who replies to a drunk text at 6am that's like against the rules of being a designated drunk text receiver
Well, my family didn't see me in my drunken super slut state at Summerfest, so there must be a God.
If I die tonight, I want you to have the rest of my nachos. And my porn collection.
I probably won't go. Last time I got drunk with those guys I just started demanding people let me touch their beards.Then I mocked everyone who didn't have facial hair.
Nothing quite like the "I had sex you a month ago and now we're stopped at the same 4 way" wave
He is currently passed out on his toilet. Point day drinking.
WHY IS SHE PANDERING YOU, A SIMPLE GOBLIN, TINY WEENER PICTURES OVER STATE LINES
Shut up. You had me at killer robots. Your place or mine?
Success! We fucked roommates!
Randomize
