Its not small because its small, Its small because it was cold outside
Go on vacation with her and forget to pack pants. I did that once and it worked like a charm.
We had to leave the bar because you were trying to show the bartender your boobs for water.
The pride tent is doing free lube tastings. There is also a mechanical bull.
She went dumpster diving. Found flourescent light bulbs, carpet samples and $15. We got a bottle of Popov, played star wars and threatened random people with the carpet. Get on our level.
Apparently you get kicked out of gay bars if they catch you putting the entire free condom bowl in your purse.
But he made me breakfast and understands the fuck sleep fuck sleep necessities
Yeah I'm a responsible adult man but I legally unbind myself from anything that occurred that evening and am in no way responsible for those actions.
don't trust your eyes. just sniff them. if they smell like axe, they are broke, move on to the next.
All i really wanna do tonight is get drunk with you and dance on tables. is that too much to ask?
We ended up debating which Food Network host would do best in porn.
Does Jim keep sending you pics of him in drag too???? If so, are you also slightly uncomfortable?
I can not be a lesbian living on Beaverland.
Currently googling hangover cures, which looks a lot like working from the perspective of my boss.
Do you think it's illegal to drive without your pants on?
Randomize