shes hot in the i'd deny it if anyone asked kinda way
I fucking hate vegan toaster pastries. You don't fuck with poptarts. It's like baseball...it's the backbone of american sport and you don't change it. Poptarts are the backbone of american fatasses and you don't just go changing them.
i just watched a video of two girls fucking with a banana and i thought of you.
i hate you
Theres a baby at this concert double fisting pacifiers. shes gunna do great in college.
can you explain why there is a dead rabbit in my front seat?
idk, I had a turtle in mine.
My vagina has officially become a vortex for sexually confused frat guys.
I spent an hour trying to convert bar outfits to church outfits. Its hard.
no, throwing your underwear at it is not the solution to everything
THERE ARE SO MANY ALCOHOLS IN MY BLOOD RIGHT NOW
So we came to a decision, you need to fuck your hot roommate and send us pictures. We voted, so don't hate the democracy this great country stands for
We had sex twice and at Wendy's how dare you diminish that.
A homeless man gave him a blanket and an ambulance drove him to sarahs...
We banged in my car doggy style with my head out the window. The sky was marvelous and I saw a shooting star. Its destiny; we're meant to fuck forever.
It's 7am. I'm sitting on the curb in last nights clothes with a nose bleed and no idea how to get home. Low moment I feel.
I just left a 3 minute voicemail to the guy I want to fuck baby talking my cats and I don't know if I can delete it 😐
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