I am NOT getting arrested in a batman mask
Trying not to fart in the comp lab is going to take everything i've got.
even if everyone didnt know them screaming eskimo brothers and high fiveing over my head kinda gave it away
I guess you can say it's a tradition... whoever brings home the ugliest guy has to do all the cleaning the next day
Honestly, I don't care whether it was a guy or a girl. Best blowjob ever.
It really ruins the moment when you have to ask to resend the nude pics.
Your two fuck buddies playing ping pong together. HOW. ADORABLE!
i love when the champions come out to play im bringin the shock collar this weekend
That bottle of wine took a part of my soul with it.
Dude. Stop sending me lines from Hungry Like the Wolf
I puked so hard this morning that I peed my pants. I'm a gem.
Well I'm going to hell. But I'm going after multiple orgasms.
And then I went through the chix filet drive through for breakfast in all my republican post sex glory
Dude come over...were drunk and I'm holding a T-shirt gun and discovered beer cans are the same size as rolled shirts.
I'm just going to use my debit card. I feel bad buying pizza with the money I stole from my roommate...so I'm going to put it in my piggy bank.
Randomize
