Yeah, we realized keeping you in a cage wasn't beneficial to us
you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
well now i know if i ever need to drive puke and talk on the phone at the same time i can
Bitches at mcdonalds acting like they never seen a girl puke in her own coat pocket before
This dude has my number from April last year. Drunk me left sober me a puzzle. No confirmation of pants off business
So I stappled myself into my toga... that should be interesting getting out of later tonight...
whatever the appropriate amount of shots is to consider drunken acrobatics a good idea was a few less than I actually had
I woke up naked on my futon with a blanket half way covering my ass and 20 half eaten chicken wings on my chest... At 7 pm... That kind of day drinking
Just responding to the most professional request I've ever gotten to get shitfaced.
do you remember yelling out "insecurity makes my pussy dry!" unnecessarily loud at the bar?
I felt like I crashed a wedding. Everyone was dressed so nice and I was covered in actual dirt and a little blood.
Oh god theyre drunkenly throwing knifes now, definitely the best movie I've worked on
she threw up on her exam, awkwardly wiped it off with her sleeve and continued writing.
Im so fucked up I'm drinking baileys and coffee just to stay awake.
It's 6 in the afternoon?
Just remember I’m your roommate with extremely questionable morals
Exactly, what could possibly go wrong
Randomize
