What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
after last nights cooking expirments i have lost all faith in the fire alarm battery
It was her 21st and she had one drink and fell asleep. I hate 90lb girls.
on a related note, did you know that the fire alarm in our apartment talks?
Not quite sure what happened last night. I'll drive your dresser over to you later.....
I'm still tasting pancake mix. I think this may actually be a serious medical problem...
I ate goldfish off your shoulder, I think we had bigger issues
Walked up in time to hear him say "you saw I was in a relationship on facebook? So why are you holding my nuts?" To her. That's loyalty man
It's 6 am, I'm drunk, and celebrating the end of finals.Go ahead and ask me where I am...if you guessed a McDonald's playpen then you are correct. Badabababa I'm loving it
Is it possible to rally from a drunken seizure?
WHAT HAS MY LIFE COME TO I'M MAKING A SCARF FOR A PENIS
You can't give me tequila around boys who have girlfriends. That ain't new.
I told her to to let go of her rationtal thoughts and just enjoy the fact that i was going down on her till she passed out from sheer orgasmic pleasure.
When my parents ask, do you think "he was the cop I gave head to in order to get out of a speeding ticket" will suffice as to how we met?
Randomize
