Don't bone anyone, just think of ur vibrator lol
HHaaaaaaaaa mmmmn vibrator
dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
My clean wipe streak was ended today by two enchiladas and a can of refried beans. dammit i should have been more cautious. thanks for all ur encouragement and support.
Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
Warning...her vagina is big, like sleeping bag big.
Woke up at 4:30am to my little brother shaking me. Apparently I fell asleep naked on my kitchen table waiting for the toaster to pop. 2 years of college completed and i still havent learned my drinking limit...
...and the foreplay consisted of me threatening to cut off his hand if he didn't remove it from my back.
Grandma just handed out bail money... it's officially christmas
It wouldn't have been a big thing. If anything, I woulda apologized to you and cleaned the remote
Let's have sex soon. Just us!! Its sad that I have to specify.
Just shook hands with the bud light truck driver, thanked him for his service to our country
Just watched a guy ride a bike off his roof into his pool. On my way to the liquor store, picking you up in 20
Like for real, is your junk ok? I have to look after my investments.
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
No. I'm home alone and 100% dickless. I hate my life.
Randomize
