do you know how bad I want you right now?
As bad as i want you to stop texting me?
is that a hint?
Does adding vodka to a protein shake defeat the purpose?
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
He kept referring to his penis a his "love gun"
What do I have to do to get you laid? I talked to that girl with the ugly dog for 45 minutes trying to get you in, and all you said was "Steven Spielberg is my favorite director."
Ya. I was the definition of a shit show. I woke up outside my door when my alarm went off
you just stood there spinning and got mad if anyone tried to stop you
Ever have a day where u just waNna wake up get a blow job eat food and chill I just want today to be that day
My dad got me a charm braclet....his way of trying to support my gayness....
He wheeled me around walmart in a cart, and stole at least 30 dollars of junior mints fpr me. Best date ever.
Right now, there's some ten year old kid getting ready to go outside and play basketball. He will soon find out his basketball hoop was no match for my car.
Swish.
I just used a thesaurus to write a sext...
I drunkenly texted ur dad last night telling him he raised great kids hahahahaha
i had to win in rock paper scissors, get called a fat whore, and make two dudes get in a fight so we could call next game on the table and you make zero cups. thanks asshole.
Apparently I gave a guy a hand job on the dance floor. ON THE DANCE FLOOR.
Randomize
