i just saw a guy carrying a medieval times commemerative glass filled with vomit.. there were 2 people cheering him from behind
nothing this campus sells is worth it. not even sex.
ugh. my soul tastes like vodka
Yes but life is bad with poopy sheets
Ever since I got married, I've become the MacGuyver of masturbation
Thats the last thing I remember and then I woke up in this Dutch kids dorm and he was taking a picture of me while I was sleeping
I'll be honest, not actually surprised to find half a Big Mac box and bits of broken security glass by the sofa.
if theres anything i pride myself on, its my ability to look homeless.
I just want to fall into a pit of xannies and eat my way out.
Can we please start going to the gym before I accidentally kill someone via explosive fat girl pants button accident
Typing up notes at the bar and doing shots with the bartender until close on a Wednesday. This is what my second year of law school has become.
Remember when we were coked out at that house and we were trying to meditate in the bathroom? Who's house were we at?
Sent him a nude and I forgot to crop out the Jesus picture in the background. The Catholic guilt is too real.
MY TITS JUST CAUSED A CAR ACCIDENT ON THE HIGHWAY! i kid you not!! i thinl the giy is actually dead
I woke up next to a Big Mac box.. And had no sheets or clothes on. The night was a success I think.
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